I’m not entirely sure what the point is of New Year’s Resolutions, but I assume they are made in a flush of early-January enthusiasm, to try to ensure that the following year will be better. My New Year’s Resolution was to ‘travel more’, which sounds very glamorous and fun. It’s not, because my New Year’s Resolution was to ‘travel more in London’, which means that I now spend most of my life furiously angry at late buses or delayed tubes, merrily shoving money I don’t have into the pockets of TfL.
Equally, because of this new travelling lark, I have seen inside roughly the same number of houses as a fairly lazy estate agent. Which has opened my eyes to several things:
1. A lot of my friends are spending way too much money on liquid hand soaps. I would encourage them to do as I do, and use Fairy liquid.
It makes both economic and hygienic sense.
2. Plastering your walls with boyband posters is not ‘interior design’.
(You know who you are).
3. If you do not provide reading matter in the bathroom, you must expect people to rummage through your medicine cabinet for entertainment.
4. We get it. You made far better financial decisions than the rest of us. There’s no need to shove your beautiful-looking kitchen utensils and fancy, dishwasher-proof plates in my face.
5. I need a more comfortable sofa.