Facebook. (You’re doing it wrong)

We’ve all been on Facebook for a while now.

But I feel that it’s time for a quick refresher course in what is, and is not, acceptable Facebook behaviour.

1. Posting 40,000 photos of you and your partner
Unacceptable. It begs so many questions. How did you take the photo? Was it on automatic timer? In which case, why? And if not, who is the creepy third wheel who is following you around your romantic break?

2. Posting photos of your engagement ring


Unacceptable. There are only two people who care about your engagement ring. Your actual, real-life friends, and your insurance provider. There is no need to show it to anyone else.

3. Posting inane status updates
Acceptable. It helps the rest of us feel better about ourselves, knowing that you are ‘really thirsty and want to leave work!!!!!’

4. Posting photos of yourself posing
Acceptable. Please see (3).

5. Friend requesting people you have met once.
Unacceptable. And actually extremely odd. Please seek professional help immediately. And when I say ‘professional’, I do not mean your ‘girlfriend’*

*lady you once met and bought a drink for*

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5 Comments

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5 responses to “Facebook. (You’re doing it wrong)

  1. 6. Unacceptable: including updates about your latest riveting exploits in farmville/castlevill/pokerville*. We don’t have any rubies, or lambs, I promise.

    * or any other ville.

  2. @easty22

    you missed this one:

    6. “John Doe: is pissed off/fuming/mad at someone” then someone comments “what’s up hun?”. Response “sorry I can’t say….”.
    Then don’t tell the facebook world about it in the first place! *rant over*

  3. “Please seek professional help immediately. And when I say ‘professional’, I do not mean your ‘girlfriend’*
    *lady you once met and bought a drink for”

    made me do an unacceptably snorty laugh

  4. Joe

    I have only met you once. I friend requested you, and you accepted.

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