When I was 14, I called my Father. I wanted a t-shirt I had seen in Topshop. It was pink, and had a picture of a cherry pie on it, and it said ‘juicy tart’. (I’m not saying I had fabulous taste, but I knew something about branding). Anyway, I dutifully called my Father and asked if I could have £14.99. Well, if I’m being strictly honest, I asked for £17 because I needed the bus fare. My Father thought, and decided ultimately that I did not need the t-shirt as he was ‘certain’ he had seen me previously wearing a t-shirt. It is hard to argue with logic like this. I often wish I had the same fiscal restraint. And more money. Here is some free financial advice:
2. Sometimes, you will go out to dinner. Order everything. You’re going to split the bill, so it’s the only financially responsible thing to do. Otherwise, you’re going to end up paying £28 for a salad and a diet coke.
3. It is ALWAYS worth spending money on the following:
a) Underwear. I can’t be bothered to explain all the reasons why, but to single-handedly fight and defeat a mountain bear, whilst knitting a rug for an aged relative and updating your CV, all you need is a truly excellent bra and knicker set.*
b) Haircuts. Trust me. I once cut my little brother’s hair and he was so distressed he was EXCUSED FROM SCHOOL FOR A DAY.
c) Perfume. I don’t know what they put in those SPECIAL CLEARANCE SALE bottles, but I suspect it is the tears of cave people who have only ever eaten offal and drunk lumpy milk.