Something I wish really existed, outside of adverts and rom-coms, is the perfect day-to-night summer time outfit. Now this perfect summer outfit is cunning, and really the only way I can see it working successfully is if you have either a jumper carrier (whipped boyf/ small slave boy) or an enormously large bag. Because no matter how great your darling summer dress is while the sun is out (sun- ha!), the minute that bad boy disappears you’re going to be freezing. And not in an ethereal, other-worldy ‘Oh golly, don’t worry about ME! I’m simply always cold because I’m just so terribly fragile and skinny’ way. No, in a grumpy, ‘take me home NOW can’t you see I’m absolutely freezing and I’m not having any fun’ way.
Now, I know a prophet is never appreciated in his own land so people are going to continue to go out all day without planning for this (and also without wearing sunscreen, but I feel that Baz Luhrmann has really put his stamp all over that particular issue), but if you would like your summer nights to be more like a Ralph Lauren advert, you should probably buy the following. I imagine you have unlimited funds, but like the Middleton sisters are keen to promote the high street to show your ghetto roots.
1. This old thing? Oh, you know, I just slung it on and now look effortlessly pretty and warm. I can’t help it.
2. Only £149 for a cardigan? They gave me enough material for three cardigans. It’s really very much like the Tesco ‘Buy 1, get 2 free’. I probably made money.
3. Well this is obviously a 3-way cardigan. Cardigan, girdle and dressing gown. I’m sold.
4. What do you mean, did I use to be fat?! This is OVERSIZED. It makes me look stupidly slim. Gosh. Totally worth it.