Tag Archives: young Vic

Recently, I went with a very good friend to Chekov’s 3 Sisters, at the Young Vic. My friend had organised the tickets (second row, no big deal), so I was in charge of organising the dinner. I very much like to eat out, but I have 2 very specific requirements of restaurants.

1. I usually bike everywhere, so arrive for almost every social occasion desperately thirsty. Any restaurant who bothers to bring me the ‘vat of water’ I have begged for quickly will instantly rise in my opinion. (Which, obviously, is extremely important to them, I imagine).

2. I am happy to spend money in restaurants. I am fully aware of mark-ups, and price hiking, and overheads and so on, and I still think that the whole arrangement is splendid- the idea that you get to choose exactly what you want, that someone else makes it, and you don’t have to clean up afterwards. I am only unhappy if I leave a restaurant still hungry.

With these requirements in mind, I made my dinner choice carefully. Having been the victim of several ‘serious discussions’ from my housemates on why ‘it is not normal to eat an entire loaf of bread for dinner’, I plumped for sushi.

I was first taken to YO! Sushi years and years ago, when it had just opened its first London restaurant. To this day, I am saddened by its later removal of the original drinks-delivery robots, who used to beep alarmingly whenever an unsuspecting customer stood in their path.

Luckily, they have continued to serve their food on those awesome conveyor belts, so, swallowing sadness about my lost robot friend, I decided to book us in there.

‘I need these,’ I told my friend, as we sat down. ‘These little at-the-table fizzy and still water taps. You know how some people have those boiling water taps? These are so much better.’ My friend mumbled something indistinctly through a mouthful of salmon sashimi. ‘You’re right,’ I continued. ‘I should start eating.’

When I was first taken to YO! Sushi I gleefully told my Mother that, here, finally, was a restaurant where you were encouraged to play with your food. ‘Look,’ I exclaimed happily. ‘The dishes go around on the conveyor belt, and you snatch them off and eat them! The person with the most empty dishes at the end wins.’ Although my Mother tried valiantly to convince me that this was in fact not correct, I still approach YO! Sushi in the same manner.

I had:

Salmon sashimi (very good, and they have lots of fresh ginger on the table which is awesome, because often Japanese restaurants are very stingy with the fresh ginger and you keep having to ask for it and they hate you and spit in your green tea).

 Chicken Gyoza (which, taking the advice of my friend, I ordered hot from the waiter) were excellent, and as somewhat of a dumpling expert, I feel confident in saying this. (I have become a dumpling expert through an arduous process of trial-and-error, shovelling dumplings into my face weekly all over the world. I am also a toothbrushing expert, but there is no need to show off).

Cucumber maki (this was while I was considering which teriyaki I wanted, and pondering the noodle question- sort of like a palate-cleanser, really. Only with more rice).

Mixed (prawn, salmon and tuna) nigri (just to check whether I preferred nigri (long horizontal rice, slice of fresh fish on top) or maki (rice in roll, filling inside, wrapped in seaweed).

Beef nigri (I was still undecided).

Soft-shell crab inside-out roll (because I love love love soft shell crab and don’t like to play by the rules- once I even ate an after-eight mint for breakfast. It tasted horrible, but that might have had more to do with it being breakfast time than being before 8pm).

Fresh crab and mango inside-out roll (because it is terribly important to eat fresh fruit, and this concoction of Fresh crab, avocado and mayonnaise wrapped with fresh mango with keta caviar looked absurdly delicious).

I would have eaten more (I am always exceptionally keen to win) but we had to pop off and see the play. My friend ate some things too, but as her end tower of stacked empty plates was far shorter than mine, I’m not sure it really counts.

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Not what I expected

I arrived early at Southwark, and called to let my Father know. ‘Walk towards me.’ ‘I’m sorry?’ ‘Yes. You know where I work? Walk towards me.’ ‘Um. I’ll just meet you outside the station. See you in a bit.’ (It is imperative my parents remain unaware of how little I listen to them. I am aiming for the level of blissful ignorance that saw a friend of mine felled by a GCSE French presentation class. ‘And what does he do, your Père?’ our French teacher asked. ‘I don’t know,’ my friend replied. ‘OK. Tell me in English then.’ ‘I don’t know in English.’ ‘I’m sorry?’ ‘Yes. I don’t know what my Father does. In English or French.’ This was really one of the highlights of my school career. I spent the rest of term making suggestions to my friend about nefarious activities her Father might be getting involved in. To be fair, none of which would have been lucrative enough to pay the school fees).

Anyway, my Father dutifully walked towards me, and we went off to the Young Vic. ‘Would you like a drink?’ ‘Oh, yes please. A vodka tonic would be great.’ ‘A vodka tonic?’ my Father said, in a contemptuous tone. ‘How boring.’ (In my family, it is preferable to be a pederast than to be boring). ‘They have cocktails here. I will order you one.’ ‘Oh, how nice. Thanks Dad.’ ‘I will order this one. It has whiskey, and schnapps, and honey vodka, and normal vodka. Oh and fresh raspberries. I will order one for myself too.’ ‘Um, OK. And perhaps a glass of tap water?’ ‘Well, obviously get whatever you want,’ my Father said, baffled.

The waitress disappeared, and returned with two glasses of tap water. My Father looked at them. ‘These are terribly plain, aren’t they? Not what I was expecting at all.’ ‘I’m sorry?’ ‘Well, where are the raspberries?’ ‘Um, Dad? This is the tap water.’

The play really had nothing on my Father’s excellent, if somewhat unplanned wit.

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Almost Brecht

My Father called me last Saturday. I was barely alive, so I don’t remember much of the conversation. He called again on Sunday, when I was a little less hungover. ‘Well,’ he said, ‘That’s very good. We can have dinner there before. I do like Brecht.’ ‘Yes.’ I wondered what other, mysterious things I had agreed to do. I would just wait and see. It was rather exciting.

I merrily started my week, continuing to be my Mother’s PA (which I am doing either spectacularly or dreadfully it depends if she’s being sarcastic or not). The receptionist called me. ‘A gentleman keeps calling for you.’ ‘Yes.’ ‘Well, aren’t you excited?’ ‘It’s my Father, isn’t it.’

I picked up the phone. ‘Hi Dad.’ ‘So, just to confirm, let’s meet in the foyer at 6.30 tonight.’ I was in too deep. ‘Of course! Looking forward to it! I also like Brecht! Well, I’m not sure if ‘like’ is the correct word, but yes, smashing!’ I quickly started google searching Brecht plays in London. Nothing.

I called my Father. ‘Hi Dad.’ ‘Oh hello. What’s wrong?’ ‘Oh nothing,’ I said breezily. ‘Just wondering where the theatre is.’ ‘Oh, yes. The Young Vic. It’s actually closer to Southwark.’ ‘Marvellous!’ (It is possible my Father now thinks I have some kind of over-excitement disorder, but he probably thinks Brecht will calm me down).

I popped over to the Young Vic website. ‘What’s On?’ I asked politely. ‘Disco Pigs’. I see that I am less well-versed in Brecht than I thought. I read on. ‘Pig and Runt are soulmates. They share an appetite for drunkenness, recklessness and destruction. But on the eve of their 17th birthday it is an appetite for sex that threatens to tear them apart.’

I am not sure I can watch a live performance of an episode of ‘Skins’ with my Father. I call him back. ‘Hi Dad. Obviously I’ve been looking forward to this for ages, but could you just remind me of the title of the play? It’s going to be great!’ My Father dutifully tells me we are to see ‘Street Scene’, and decides that we should meet in the foyer, rather than the restaurant. (I believe this is because he is worried about what I will order should I arrive before him).

I look back at the Young Vic website. ‘A glorious blend of Broadway musical and American opera, Street Scene won the first ever Tony Award for Weill, confirming him as one of the 20th century’s most original and popular composers.’ I’m pretty sure Brecht never won a Tony…but then I’m hardly in a position to question my Father’s attention to detail.

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